Super Saturday: Let's Focus on the Messy Middle

I spent some time working on my book proposal this week. 

As I wrote, I soon realized something disturbing. It wasn't good. In fact, I'd even go so far as to say it sucked.

This realization made me want to close the file, shut the laptop, and go eat a handful of chocolate chips.

I'm in the messy middle, and it's not fun.

The messy middle is where we're tempted to give up on a dream or goal because we are faced with the reality of what it will actually take to accomplish what we want to do.

When we first set a goal, it's exciting. We think about how great it will be to write that book, lose that weight, make that money, learn that skill, or achieve whatever dream we have.

When we accomplish the goal, it's thrilling. I wrote the book! I lost the weight! I made the money! I learned the skill! I achieved my dream!

We often forget about the messy middle. The hours and hours we have to sit and write, rewrite, and edit our words before they become a book that is ready for readers. The cravings we have to ignore, the choices we have to make, and the exercise we need to put in before those pesky pounds are shed. The calls we have to make, the hard work we have to put in, and the sacrifices we have to make before we make the money, learn the skill, or achieve the dream.

It's hard, but it's absolutely necessary.

I'd even say the accomplishment of our goal or dream wouldn't be nearly as sweet without the hard work we chose to put in during the messy middle.

So I'll keep writing that book proposal. It will suck at first, but each hour I spend at it will hopefully make it better and better. Someday, it might even lead to a finished book about depression that will be an encouragement to many people.

That will be sweet, and worth every second of the messy middle.

  

"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." (Galatians 6:9 NIV)

Are you tempted to give up when you're in the messy middle? How can focusing on God help you to work through that difficult time and accomplish your goals and dreams?

Super Sorry Saturday: Let's Focus on Better Late Than Never

We went to Rock Rapids yesterday to celebrate Gary's birthday with his mom and siblings. It was nice getting together with them and enjoying a nice meal at Pizza Ranch. 

We stayed at Denny and Holly's and stayed up late talking after we got home from supper. I had planned to do my Focus Friday around ten or eleven (as usual), but I looked up and it was 11:45! We went to bed and I decided to make it a Sorry Saturday.

Well, it has become a Super Sorry Saturday because I didn't sit down to write during the day today, either. So that's our focus for this week: getting something done even if it's late.

It was tempting to just say "Oh well, I'll just skip my blog this week" but I didn't want to disappoint my loyal readers and break my streak of posting every week.

I think we can apply this to other areas of our lives, too.

Just because we feel like we've missed the right time to do something, it can still be worth it to complete the task or project.

I have a pile of Christmas letters that I am going to send out this week. I know it's very late. It would be easier to just forget about them, but I did that last year and I really want to connect with my family and friends. They will probably sigh and shake their heads at my tardiness, but hopefully they will be glad to receive it.  

Maybe you've been putting off a project because you are uncertain about it. What if it doesn't turn out like you hope it will? What if people don't like it? What if....? What if...? What if...? If you have been prompted over and over to do something, it's time to get at it, even if it feels like you're too late.

Send that birthday card even if it's a month later. Write a short letter to go with it. Your friend will enjoy hearing from you.

Read a few days from your One Year Bible, even if you're not caught up to today's date. Over time, reading two days' worth each day will get you back on track.

Most of all, show yourself grace when you realize you've missed getting something done on time. We're all busy and we do the best we can. 

Sometimes you have to do something late (pay that overdue bill you found in that stack of papers), at times you can choose to do something late (send the birthday card you wrote out and then misplaced for a while), and other times you can let something go (household chores don't always have to be done every single week).

Doing things on time is a good goal to have, but doing things late can bring blessings, too.

"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." (Galatians 6:9 NIV)

What have you put off that you feel like finishing even if it's late? How can focusing on God help you to get things done and show yourself grace when you miss a deadline?

Focus Friday: Let's Focus on Pushing Through

I've felt pretty blah the last couple of days.

This isn't me, but it very well could be...especially with the snack in hand.

I'm not exactly sure why. Maybe it's the adjustment back to "normal" life after a nice week of vacation. Maybe it's the reminder that we live in an unstable world full of crazy people that drive trucks through happy crowds of people minding their own business. Maybe it's from letting some of my negative thoughts stick around too long and wreak havoc in my brain.

At our Fresh Hope support group last night we talked about challenging negative thinking. It's a tricky thing for people who suffer with a mood disorder: Is the depression causing the negative thoughts or is the negative thinking adding to the depression?

As someone who has dealt with depression, it's important for me to recognize negative thinking when it occurs. I thought I was getting pretty good at that, but our discussion last night helped me to see that I've been letting some negative thoughts influence my mood.

Here are some ideas to challenge thinking negatively:

• Retrain your brain. Acknowledge the negative thought, but look at it logically and try to change how you are thinking.
• Talk to a trained therapist who can help you learn strategies for replacing negative thoughts with positive ones.
• Write your negative thoughts in a journal. If you like doing this, it can help you to evaluate whether your thoughts are true or not and also notice triggers that get you thinking negatively.
• Relaxation. This can reduce "clutter" in your mind and short-circuit the urge to focus too much on your negative thoughts.
• Work on your physical well-being. Eating right, exercising, getting enough sleep, and being around other people can help you feel better about yourself and give you the energy you need to challenge those negative thoughts.

The most important reminder I got last night was when we read the Fresh Hope tenets. We read these basic principles weekly and one sentence really hit me: I choose the support of people who will urge me to "push through."

That's what I want to leave you with this week. If you're feeling blah from depression or just the everyday ups and downs of life, keep pushing through. The negative thoughts, the tough situations, the challenges you think you can't succeed at...all of those will be behind you soon enough if you just push through. You may need help from a loved one or a professional, but it will be worth it. Please, don't give up.  

I didn't feel like writing tonight, but I'm so glad I "pushed through" and did it anyway. I hope you can push through, too, whatever your situation is.

"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." (Galatians 6:9 NIV)

Do you struggle with negative thinking? How can focusing on God help you to keep pushing through in spite of your negative thoughts and emotions?

*Many of the practical ideas in this week's blog came from Fresh Hope's Topic Card #405 - Challenging Negative Thinking