Magnificent Monday: Let's Focus on No More Guilt (and the North Rim of the Grand Canyon)

I'm sorry I didn't post on Friday evening, but I had a very good excuse. I was on my way out west with Gary so we could hike from the North Rim of the Grand Canyon. We didn't have internet access for several days...and so I did not post. 

We enjoyed hiking down from the North Rim and camping at Cottonwood Campground, then hiking back out today. It was grueling (as the Grand Canyon usually is) but beautiful.

As we hiked, I starting thinking about this blog. I felt guilty about not posting on Friday, but as I hiked I made a decision to never post another "Sorry Saturday," "Sad Sunday," etc. again.

Oh, I will probably post sometimes on Saturday, Sunday, or Monday, but I'm going to try not to hold on to any guilt about that. After all, I didn't sign a contract that promised a Friday night post. I know my loyal readers might miss it, but they can wait a few days. They have other things to do until I get a post up here.

So from now on, if it isn't a "Focus Friday," it's going to be a "Super Saturday," "Superb Sunday," or "Magnificent Monday."

I'm realizing more and more that when I let my mind go in negative directions, it affects my satisfaction with life and, often, my mental health. Maybe you find that, too, even if you don't deal with depression or a similar disorder.

Can we let go of the guilt we feel for little mistakes and failures? Can we focus instead on the things we do right and the successes we enjoy?

Successes like hiking seven miles down and then seven miles back up the North Kaibab trail at the Grand Canyon.

I'll leave you with a few pictures of our adventure the last couple of days and I'll see you again on Friday. 

There are more trees on the North Rim and they are just starting to turn. So pretty!

Here I am at one of the bridges on the trail.

You know me and my flowers (foreground)

Gary had the great idea of taking a pic of our shadows as we started hiking.

You can see a bridge at the bottom of this picture and how the trail loops around on the right side here.

"Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself to have attained this. Instead I am single-minded: Forgetting the things that are behind [the Focus Friday or something else I missed] and reaching out for the things that are ahead [next week's blog post or some other project], with this goal in mind, I strive toward the prize of the upward [seven miles upward?] call of God in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 3:13-14 NIV - italics mine)

Do you have a hard time letting go of guilt? How can focusing on God help you to let it go and enjoy all of the good things He helps you to do and experience?

Focus Friday: Let's Focus on What We're Moving Toward

Gary and I attended an event in Omaha on Thursday about Mental Health and the Church. It was put on by Fresh Hope (we facilitate a small group in Allison). It was a good day of hearing talks from Amy Simpson, Joe Padilla, and Pastor Brad Hoefs.

I enjoyed the day so much, but I was surprised to find myself getting kind of emotional toward the end of the event. Tears filled my eyes and I had to brush them away. I tried to figure out what was going on that was making me cry, but I was kind of stumped. 

I think it had to do with medicine at first. I started wondering if I should try going off my medicine (even though Fresh Hope strongly advocates for working with your doctors and staying on the medicines they prescribe), and then that kind of turned into negative feelings about the future. 

How silly to sit in the middle of an event focused on hope for those with a mental health challenge and start to lose that same hope. 

The Bible mentions hope over 120 times - that's a lot of hope!

Finally, my thoughts started to come back around when I heard Pastor Brad say something like this: "Focus on what you're moving toward, not what you're moving away from."

As you know, I love that word "focus." I realized what was going wrong in my thinking. I was focusing on the depression, the uncertainties of my mental health, the challenges of each day and what could go wrong.

Instead, I had to get my focus back where it belonged. I had to think about moving toward hope and a thriving life because Christ lives in me. 

We're more likely to hit the target if we're actually looking toward it instead of  behind us.

Maybe you're dealing with similar challenges as you read this. Can I urge you to focus on what you're moving toward instead of what you're moving away from?

Focus on little acts of kindness you can show toward your spouse that will bring you closer instead of focusing on how he (or she) has offended you or your own mistakes in communicating and relating.

Focus on small changes that will move you closer to a healthier, slimmer body instead of focusing on your tendency to overeat or what you look like in the mirror.

Focus on how much God loves you instead of focusing on how many times you've failed Him. (Another great quote from Thursday's event: "You're safe and you're enough.")

Focus on what you're moving toward instead of what you're moving away from. As for me, I'm going to keep moving toward hope.

"...one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal...." (Philippians 3:13-14 NIV)

Are you focused too much on what you're moving away from? How can focusing on God help you to move steadily ahead toward your goal?

Focus Friday: Let's Focus on...(what was that again?...oh yeah)...Forgetting

I almost forgot to post today. Seriously, I did. I mean, you probably think I almost forget every week since I post so late at night, but usually I'm thinking about Focus Friday most of the day and just put off writing it. Today I didn't remember it was Friday until about 4 p.m. Forgetting seems like a good subject to focus on this week. I forgot several other things today. 

I took the boys to get their physicals today and I couldn't remember if Blake had chicken pox as a kid. I vaguely remembered seeing a picture of him with spots, but I didn't remember a doctor's visit or lots of calamine lotion. I felt a little bit like a failure as a mom. Shouldn't I remember things like that?

This afternoon I was piddling around with some paperwork and the phone rang at 2:45. "Robyn, I have you down for a color at 2:30, did I mess up?" "No, I did!" I yelped and I assured my hair dresser that I would be right there. Luckily she only lives a few blocks away. I felt a little bit like a failure because I kept her waiting and wasn't responsible.

After supper I decided to read the end of "After the Leaves Fall" by Nicole Baart. It was great and I started to set the book down when I noticed a little lump. I opened the book and saw one Black Hills gold earring and I suddenly remembered that I had taken my earrings out at the salon and had stuck them in my book. Don't ask - I have no idea why I thought that would be a good place to put them. Anyway, I read my book for a few minutes while I was there so I checked my purse and then called Susan to see if was there. Yes, it was, so I ran back over to pick it up. I felt a little bit like a failure for losing something special to me in such a weird way.

I'm sure there were other goofs today, I just don't remember them. 

I really felt silly when all of these things happened, but as it nears midnight I'm realizing something very interesting. I forgot and goofed up, but life went on. The nurse didn't really care if Blake had chicken pox as a kid, he still needed a booster shot. My hairdresser wasn't upset with me being a little late, and she just laughed and said she was glad she didn't step on my earring before she found it. I moved on from each of these goofs pretty well. I felt "a little bit like a failure" but I didn't dwell on any of those situations.

The thing is, in the not so distant past these mistakes would have really upset me. I would have felt like a huge failure and probably would have cried a little about each of them, even if it was just by myself. Mistakes used to mean I was a terrible person and I wondered if I could ever do anything right. In recent years I've been learning to let mistakes go. (Maybe that's because I'm getting so much practice!) 

I'm learning to separate my worth from what I do. I've been reminded of that as I study "The Search For Significance" with a group of women on Mondays. God loves me completely and unconditionally. His love isn't dependent on how I act and it isn't taken away for the mistakes I make. It is always there. Now that's something I won't ever forget.

"But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 3:13b-14 NIV)

Do you ever forget things? How can focusing on God help you to separate yourself from your mistakes so that you can remember that He loves you completely?

Focus Friday: Let's Focus on Moving Forward

I spent last week in Michigan and I left to drive home to Iowa on Sunday morning. The roads were very slick when I left my sister's house in Wyoming. I drove below the speed limit because I felt pretty nervous. About twenty minutes down the road my windshield wipers stopped working and I really needed them.

Thankfully, God provided a shop that was open and right next to the McDonald's I had stopped at and after my wipers were fixed I got back on the road. The roads were still bad, the snow was coming down, and I was really afraid but I kept driving.

I stopped for some gas and I checked weather.com and I could see that a band of snow was going through but I should drive out of it at Benton Harbor. So, I got back on the road again. I couldn't see very well and I was very nervous but as I kept moving forward I finally drove out of it.

The roads were dry, it was a little bit brighter, the snow stopped and I felt confident and good again. If I had stayed in Zeeland it probably would have been snowing all day long and I would have felt nervous and anxious all day as I kept driving around on those roads, but as I moved forward I got to a good spot again.

That's what we have to do in life. We have to keep moving forward with the promises of God to guide us and trust that we will get to a good spot again even if we're going through something really difficult.

Don't stay stuck in the mess you may be in right now. Focus on moving forward. 

One thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.
                                                 (Philippians 3:13-14 NIV)

Are you driving around and around on icy, dangerous streets in your life instead of moving cautiously forward until you come to a better place? How can focusing on God give you the strength to move forward instead of staying stuck?