Focus Friday: Let's Focus on Gardening

(This is my actual backyard garden)

When Gary was candidating to come to Platte, some of the ladies asked me, "Do you garden?"

I stammered out an apologetic, "No, not really."

They recovered quickly and said that was fine. "Beth loved flowers," they explained.

My heart sank as I wondered how disappointed some would be if I didn't garden like the previous pastor's wife. I put it out of my mind and forgot about it until we moved in.

One of our new friends proudly showed me the garden spot out back that she and some other ladies had graciously weeded before we came. I smiled and thanked her, but honestly, I had no idea what was growing there. Nothing was blooming, and all I could think about was how I would disappoint her when I let it get overgrown with weeds.

Well, lo and behold, I started to spend a few minutes most days looking at those plants and pulling a few weeds. I could recognize grass and thistles. Gary pointed out a few trees that were started to grow, so I chopped those off.

We've gotten lots of moisture this spring and summer, so the garden has done well. Things started to get buds and then they bloomed:

And as they bloomed, I got more and more interested in my garden.

 I spent a little more time each day. I pulled off the wilted petals and watched to see when more would open,

The phlox is just starting to bloom!

 I asked a friend to come look at it and tell me for sure which plants were weeds. She pointed some out and I cleaned up my garden a little more.

I thought these tall plants might be weeds, but they started blooming and they're so pretty!

As we've done house visits, I've taken notice of people's flowers. I've admired them and asked questions. 

On Tuesday I went along with a new friend on a garden tour. I saw so many neat things that I could hardly sleep that night. My mind was racing with ideas for what I could plant in our yard!

We went to lots of homes on that tour, and it seems like almost every place had something they pointed out that had died. They talked about replanting trees or plants that just hadn't made it. I was reassured that I could garden even if I didn't do it perfectly.

I also heard lots of talk about "creeping jenny" and how it can threaten to take over a garden if you're not careful.

Don't let that cute little flower fool you - this is an annoying weed!

Several times I heard women murmur behind me, "They look happy." I thought that was so cute that they judged the plants with such a human emotion, but as I looked, I could see it. The healthy plants really did look happy.

Besides spending time in my garden, I also find myself wanting to reread some fiction books that deal with gardening. The Secret of the Rose series by Michael Phillips, Some Wildflower in My Heart by Jamie Langston Turner, and A Garden to Keep by Jamie Langston Turner are some of my favorites.

I remember these christian authors beautifully explaining many spiritual principles as they used flowers and gardening in their novels. I want to visit those stories again and take note of the little details I probably missed before, now that I have more of a gardener mindset.

I know I want to make sure I'm spending just as much time in the garden of my heart as I am out in my literal garden. I need to water it with a steady soaking of God's word. There are stubborn habits and negative thoughts to pull, and I need to ask for help when I'm not sure what's growing there. I need to take notice of the promising buds that appear out of nowhere, and enjoy the beauty when God allows something to finally bloom in my heart.

I hope I'll remember that every time I look at the flowers in my back yard. 

"The grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of our God endures forever." (Isaiah 40:8 NIV)

Do you like to garden? How can focusing on God help you to grow the garden of your heart with as much care as a flower or vegetable garden?

(You can check out a few more of my garden pictures in my Facebook gardening album)

Focus Friday: Let's Focus on Asking for Help

I don't like asking for help.

I'll struggle with something for far too long before I finally admit that I can't do it myself.

It can be little things like pickle jars that won't open or not being able to move a piece of furniture on my own.

It can also be bigger things, usually more emotional than physical.

That was part of the problem when I got so depressed about four years ago. I was struggling with different aspects of a teaching job and I wouldn't ask for help. Even worse, people were offering help and I was just too sick to accept it.

I've been experiencing some of those same feelings lately. Oh, don't worry, it won't turn into depression this time. I'm healthy enough to notice how I'm thinking and feeling, and I'm going to do what I need to do to stay healthy emotionally.

Part of that is asking for help.

I need to talk to Gary about everything and not just hope these annoying anxious thoughts go away on their own.

I need to reach out to others when I'm not sure how to do something, so I don't get stressed out about whatever it is.

Gardening, for example.

I've been feeling a bit of stress about "my" garden.

I put my in quotes because it was actually the previous pastor's wife who planted some flowers in the backyard. Before we got here, some of the ladies weeded the area. Only one plant was blooming, but it looked very nice.

I went out there several times, but I didn't really know what was growing. Then I was gone last week, and we've gotten lots of rain, and suddenly the spot looked like this:

 It doesn't look so nice, does it?

The thing is, I decided I really do want to keep it up. I've walked around Platte and there are so many pretty flower gardens. I want to have one, too!

But I don't know how. And I've been too proud to ask for help. 

I know that some of the things growing out there are weeds, like thistles and grass.

But I don't know what some of the rest of it is. I didn't want to pull out flowers, so I left it all alone.

This morning I took a walk, and on my way home I saw my neighbor Suzy working in her yard. She has lots of flowers, so I stopped to talk to her. She showed me how she was cutting some of her plants back so they would keep growing. 

I told her how I wanted to garden, but I didn't know how. "I didn't know how at first, either," she said.

"How did you learn?"

She thought a moment and said that she had a couple of sisters-in-law that gardened and she learned from them.

I went home and spent a little time in my garden. I was dismayed by all of the weeds I saw, but I was also encouraged when I saw buds on some of the plants and realized I'll see some flowers soon.

(I don't know what this is, but I think it has buds)

Look, a lily!

I think these are something, too, but I don't know what.

It's time to ask for help. I can keep showing up at Suzy's and ask lots of questions. I know there are lots of ladies at church that like to garden and would be happy to help me.

It's just getting past that initial embarrassment of admitting that I don't know what I'm doing. I'll have to be willing to laugh at myself if they come over and can't believe I didn't know that a certain plant was just a weed. 

I can't compare my efforts with the beautiful yards some people have. I just need to learn with the small area that someone planted for me and see if I like gardening enough to expand in the years ahead.

I can ask when I get stuck in other areas of my life and I know someone else has the knowledge or talent to help me.

Most of all, I can ask God for help when I'm feeling anxious or uncertain. He'll show me what to do so I can get back to feeling His peace.

God, do you know anything about gardening?

"If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you." (James 1:5 NIV)

Do you find it difficult to ask for help? How can focusing on God help you to reach out to others when you're stuck in some area and need help?