Focus Friday: Let's Focus on Understanding Ourselves

I don't understand myself sometimes. 

I say one thing (I want to lose weight) and then I do something else (I eat a whole Hershey bar).

I plan to get lots accomplished in the morning and then I "piddle" my way through the day without getting much of anything done.

Sometimes I make surprising purchases.

A couple of weeks ago I went shopping with my daughter Erin in Shenandoah, Iowa and this bracelet caught my eye:

I liked the crosses and the words on the back of the charms. I tried it on, put it down, watched Erin try on some clothes and then went back to it and picked it up again. Erin had a coupon that she let me use and that clinched it. I bought it and put it on as we left the store. I enjoyed seeing it on my wrist as we went out for supper and went back to her house.

I got home to Allison and showed it to the rest of the family. Gary seemed to like it, but he commented, "I thought about a month ago you told me to never buy you a charm bracelet."

He was right. I had said that, but I had not given it one single thought as I admired and bought my bracelet. Since then, when I see it on my dresser it's a reminder of my bad memory. I still love it and I will wear it, but it shocked me that I could say something and have no recollection of it such a short time later.

On this same trip to Shenandoah, Erin and I went out to eat and got a special Mediterranean pizza. It had pesto sauce, chicken, little tomatoes, feta cheese, and an unfamiliar dark sauce on it. It was so good. That mystery sauce had such a tangy, sweet flavor. I had to dip the last pieces of my crust in the drops left on the tray to get a little more. That flavor stayed with me and I just had to know what it was!

When I got home I thought about calling the restaurant to ask about it, but somehow I figured out that it must have been balsamic vinegar. I looked into it online and found out that it was a special vinegar from Italy made from grape must and aged for years in a series of wooden barrels. 

I found out that the true balsamic vinegar made in Modena, Italy could be very expensive, but I started to dream of visiting Modena someday and convincing Gary to let me buy a bottle of vinegar, even if it cost over a hundred dollars.

A little more research helped me figure out that you could buy less expensive versions of balsamic vinegar here in the U.S. and the quality was still very good. So when I was out shopping, I picked up a bottle of it...and then a second one.

Then I bought a bottle of pesto. And a container of feta cheese. And a loaf of Garlic Ciabatta bread. I shook my head when I got home. Two bottles of something I had never used before? Pesto and feta cheese? Who was I?  

I don't understand me at all. I have done similar things in the past and then never used the special ingredients, but this time, I dove in and tried it.  

I sliced the Ciabatta bread in half.

I spread the pesto on the bread and cooked up a chicken breast.

I sprinkled feta cheese on top.

I reduced the balsamic vinegar on the stove to thicken it and then I drizzled it over my "pizza" and broiled it 'til it seemed done.

Guess what. We liked it. It wasn't as good as the restaurant in Shenandoah, but for my first try, I was pleased. I'll try again and tweak it to make it better.

I still don't understand myself, but even some of the wacky things I do can turn out pretty good. 

Anybody need a little balsamic vinegar? 

"I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do." (Romans 7:15 NIV)

Remember, God understands us completely, quirks and all:

"You have searched me, LORD, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you, LORD, know it completely. You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain." (Psalm 139:1-6 NIV) 

Do you have trouble understanding yourself sometimes? How can focusing on God help you to rest in His love, stay away from sin, and accept your own surprising actions?

Focus Friday: Let's Focus on RAGBRAI

On July 24, Gary and I rode on RAGBRAI. I had heard of the Register's Annual Great Bike Ride Across Iowa a long time ago and always thought it would be fun to do, but never took the time to train and attempt it.

This year Gary decided to do it. Well, the first day anyway. Our daughter Erin moved to Shenandoah in June and that's where the first day's ride ended. 

Gary rode to Clarksville almost daily and went to Shell Rock a few times before the ride. I rode to Clarksville a few times, but I didn't train every day. I wasn't sure I wanted to do it. We had seen RAGBRAI riders coming into Clear Lake a few years ago, and it kind of scared me to see such big groups of bikes riding together. I wasn't sure I could handle it. I could just see me getting wobbly and causing a huge crash. 

As the day got closer, I started to think about riding, too. It was "only" going to be 50 miles, I was sure I could make it. So, that morning we drove to Glenwood and Erin dropped us off. We just pulled into the campground, unloaded our bikes, took a quick picture, and got on the road with lots of other riders at about 6 a.m. 

The very first hill was a killer and I had second thoughts as I started to huff and puff up the curvy incline. But then I got to the top and coasted down a nice long hill. I think I was hooked right there.



It was daunting to look ahead and see a hill coming up, but I kept pedaling. Gary and I didn't stay together very long. We figured out that we had different ways of riding. He liked to hit the hills hard and get up them fast. I clicked down through my gears and plugged away slowly and steadily until I got to the top. We texted and talked a few times during the ride, but we went at our own pace. 

During the first half of the ride, I got to a discouraging sign. 

 I like roller coasters, but I didn't think I wanted to pedal through one. The hills were at an 8 to 10% grade and they were tough, but I kept pedaling and made it through.







Here I am halfway through at Tabor. Erin had driven there and waited for us. Gary had passed through quite a while before this, but it was nice to have a little rest with Erin and refill my water bottle. 

All of the cool RAGBRAI riders wear their helmet slightly askew like this. :-)

I also had a photo op in the park where I documented my half-success:

I don't have any pictures of the second half of the ride. Frankly, I was just trying to survive. It got hot and every hill seemed a little bit harder. My goal was to not have to walk up any hills. I did it, but I did stop at the top of several of them and rested a while. The first time I did it in the hot sun. After that I got smart and made sure to find some shade to sit in while I drank a little water and rested. More and more people asked, "Are you okay?" while I was panting next to my bike. I was okay, it was just going to take me a while to finish.

There were some really tough hills near the end, but Gary had also texted that the last few miles were relatively flat and encouraged me that I could make it. I pressed on.

It felt so good to ride into Shenandoah and cross under the banner on Main Street. I had done it! It didn't matter that Gary had finished in four hours and I had taken six hours and fifteen minutes. The most important thing was that I had finished. It felt great!

Holding the seeds they gave us at the end.

I keep thinking about RAGBRAI in the weeks since then. It's such a good comparison to life. The hard work we have to put in to get through difficult times in our life. How important it is to keep going and eventually finish our life's race. How some people stop to help when a fellow rider is having trouble. The importance of taking care of ourselves as we ride (drinking water, resting, knowing our limits). 

One of the greatest things I took away from RAGBRAI was the importance of riding your own ride. I watched people pass me (and lots of people passed me) and they were all so different. Some were in fancy bike gear with team logos on them, some were in shirts and shorts like me, some rode with a friend and chatted as they rode, other rode alone. Some looked like they were in great shape and the ride was easy. Others were huffing and puffing (like me) and had to walk up the worst hills. It was okay. We were all on RAGBRAI. Some were registered for the whole week. Others were "outlaws" and just joined in on the first day to get a taste of what RAGBRAI was like. 

I rode in RAGBRAI, but I didn't really do RAGBRAI. That honor is reserved for those who put in seven days of pedaling their hearts out. I'm glad I rode, even if it was for just one day. It will stay with me as I keep plugging away through this life I live. Some days may be an uphill climb, but I will keep going. Other days may be a joyful coast through beautiful experiences. I will choose to enjoy them fully and rest up for the inevitable hill coming up again. No matter what, I'll rely on God for my strength and courage to keep going and complete life's ride.

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 3:14 NIV)

How is your life's "ride" going? How can focusing on God help you keep going and finish your "ride" well?