Focus Friday: Let's Focus on the Victory of Admitting Defeat

I attempted NaNoWriMo this month. Writing 50,000 words in the month of November is no small task. It's only 1,667 words per day, but when you skip a few days here and there and get behind it gets a little tricky.

I let that happen this year.

I wrote 20,000 words in one day a few years ago, so I think I was subconsciously planning to pull another one of those and win the thing in spite of getting behind.

Yesterday I wrote 4,519 words and got up to 34,018 by bedtime. I knew I would need to write 15,982 words today, but I figured I could do it, no problem.

But I still exercised this morning. I wrote a few thousand words. And then I went along with Gary to go out for lunch and visit someone this afternoon. I wrote a little more. And then we had Christmas program practice. I got home at six and considered attempting nonstop typing to get done, but I had a moment of clarity and decided to let it go this year. 

Instead, Gary and I went and enjoyed "The Grinch" at our local theater. We got home at nine and then I really accepted this year's loss. There was no way I could possibly finish by midnight.

 But even before we left to see the movie, I realized something. I think I just might be maturing.

In years past, I would have spent hours typing lots of nonsense just to get to the 50,000 words. I would have gotten upset if I had been interrupted, and I never would have spent time with my husband instead of reaching the goal.

So I'm declaring this year a victory!

The victory of admitting defeat.

We all have to do that sometimes. Maybe for you it isn't with writing. 

Maybe for you it's with some other project you hoped to have completed by a certain date.

Maybe for you it's with a relationship that you hoped to restore to what it was like years ago.

Maybe for you it's with getting physically fit. You skip exercising every once in a while or you keep overeating even though you know it's bad for you.

You have to admit defeat.

But can you admit that with a mature attitude instead of getting upset and pouting about it?

Can you see the strides you made while you worked on that project, that relationship, that exercise program?

Can you look at things objectively and make plans to take steps to finish your project even though it wasn't according to your original timetable?

Can you do something to improve that relationship just a little bit, or make the decision to let it go if necessary?

Can you renew your commitment to exercise a little more and eat a little healthier, knowing that those things will move you toward better health and fitness?

When we are mature, we'll admit when something isn't working and we'll change what we're doing so that we reach our goals and live a good life. (Maybe we'll even write 50,000 words earlier in the month instead of leaving it until the last few days of NaNoWriMo)

"Brothers and sisters, stop thinking like children. In regard to evil be infants, but in your thinking be adults." (1 Corinthians 14:20 NIV)

Are you able to admit defeat? How can focusing on God help you to do that with a mature attitude and move on from there?

Super Saturday: Let's Focus on Thanks

I feel like keeping this week's post short and sweet.

We've just celebrated Thanksgiving and now we almost feel forced into the Christmas season with Black Friday sales and Christmas carols on the radio.

Maybe we need to linger a bit longer in that attitude of thanksgiving. In that vein, I thought I'd list a few things I'm thankful for here, and I invite you to share some of your own in the comments (or at least ponder them in your own heart for a while).

I'm thankful for:

God (who provided His love and all of the other people and things on this list)

My family (Gary and our children, but also each one of our extended family members)

Friends (I often say that I can't imagine my life without each person God has brought into our lives as we've moved over the years)

This beautiful world (We love to travel and explore its many wonders)

(taken this October in Canada)

The hardships I've had to go through (Yes, I'm even thankful for those times, because they helped shape me into who I am today)

The future (With all of its many possibilities and surprises)

It's good for our mental health to practice gratitude, so let's not forget to do that each and every day.

So grateful for each of you, ~Robyn

"Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever." (Psalm 107:1 NIV)

Are you thankful for everything in your life? How can focusing on God help you to be grateful every day?

Focus Friday: Let's Focus on One Little Thing

I had trouble getting out of bed for a few months.

I would set the alarm for 6:30 every night, but when it rang in the morning I would reach over, shut it off, and remain in bed.

On a good day I would get up after a little while, by 6:45 or so.

On a "bad day" I would lie there, sleeping off and on until 8 or even 9:00. It wasn't that I was super tired. I got to bed at a reasonable time. I didn't feel especially depressed, but I just couldn't seem to get up. 

I tried to figure out if I was dreading something and how I could change my thoughts so I was more excited about getting up.

I gave myself stern pep talks the night before about how important it was to get out of bed and get the day started.

Nothing worked. My rising time was still sporadic and I felt like a failure because I couldn't seem to do what I said I wanted to do.

Finally, I changed one little thing and I have rolled out of bed for ten days straight at 6:30 a.m.

I moved my alarm clock to the far side of my bedside table.

Just that two feet change caused me to move enough so that I've gotten up every single day. I can't just reach out and turn off the alarm anymore. I have to stretch over and my feet touch the floor and I'm up.

I started thinking about other situations that might be changed by one little thing.

You don't read your Bible as often as you say you want to? Put it beside your place at the breakfast table or on the kitchen counter so you can open it and read a few verses as you eat or while you're waiting for something to cook. One little thing.

You feel like your relationship with a parent or a child or a sibling isn't as close as you'd like? Make a note on the calendar to call that person once a week instead of waiting until you think of it. One little thing.

You're tired of the clutter getting in your way in your home? Fill a box with items you no longer need or use and put it in the car so you can drop it off at Goodwill the next time you go that way. One little thing.

You never seem to get any closer to accomplishing your dreams or goals? Write down as much as you can about all of the steps necessary to complete the project and then write the first small step on your calendar. One little thing.

As we keep doing one little thing at a time, those little things will add up and soon we'll be in the habit of getting up on time, reading our bible regularly, having great relationships, keeping our lives free of clutter, and accomplishing our goals.

It all starts with one little thing.

"Then Jesus said to him, "Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.[One little thing that led to the man's healing]" (John 5:8 NIV - brackets mine)

Do you have problems or frustrations that keep you stuck? How can focusing on God help you find one little thing you can do to get unstuck?

Super Saturday: Let's Focus on Fear

My mom had an encounter with a black bear recently.

Oh, don't worry. She's okay, but it got me thinking about fear this week.

Mom and Dad were watching TV one night in their house in the middle of the woods in Tennessee.

"John, there's something on the deck!"

Dad got up and turned on the outside light, only to reveal a 150-pound black bear helping himself to the goodies in their bird feeder.

While Dad ran to get the camera, Mom walked up to the patio door and knocked loudly. "Hey, get out of there!" she scolded. 

Why not? It always worked for the squirrels and raccoons that tried to steal from their feeder.

The bear turned and looked at her, then went headfirst over the deck railing. He was in no hurry at all, but he left.

Mom and I laughed about this as we talked on the phone, but it could have ended much differently.

At the time, Dad pointed out that the bear easily could have stuck a furry paw through the patio door. Luckily, that didn't happen.

I've chuckled a few times as I've thought about my fearless mother shooing a big black bear away. I tend to think that she might have reacted a bit differently if my dad had not been there. I wonder if his presence gave her more courage in that scary situation.

Now, I'm not in any way trying to compare my dear father to God, but I can't help but think about each of us and the fears we face each day. 

Illness.

Frustrations at work.

Relationship problems.

Our own shortcomings.

Death.

There are big, scary things out there, and on our own we might be terrified.

When we remember that God is with us, we find the courage we need to face all of our fears.

They might not go away as quickly as my mom's black bear, but we can give it a shot.

"Hey, get out of here!"

And even if the problem doesn't go away, we have God right beside us while we watch what happens.

"When I am afraid, I put my trust in you." (Psalm 56:3 NIV)

Are you often afraid? How can remembering that God is with you help you to face those fears with more courage?

*Note: The bear in my blog graphic above is not my mom's black bear. He left before Dad could get a picture.

Focus Friday: Let's Focus on Throwing Things Away

 

I've been doing quite a bit of writing this week, but I've also been throwing things away.

It feels great.

I've been spending some time in my craft room, going through the drawers and boxes. I have lots of great stuff, but I've also found many things to throw away.

Dried up bottles of paint. A gaudy purple trim I'll never use. Little scraps of paper I don't need. Ugly things. Broken things. 

I found a box of old letters in the craft room, so I took it upstairs to go through and try to combine with a box of old journals.

It was interesting to see what I had saved for so many years. 

Some things were precious (love letters Gary and I had exchanged while dating, cards and letters from special friends and relatives, notes about cute things our kids had done). I stuffed those into the journal box.

Other things, not so precious. 

Old birthday cards, nice at the time, but not really needed anymore. 

Wedding invitations and programs from people I hardly remembered. 

A letter from a high school friend, confirming his crush on me and wondering if it might even be love, sent to me during my freshman year of college (It was sweet at the time, but I don't need my kids finding that someday and wondering if I carried a torch for that guy for all these years! Definitely not, so it was time to throw it out). 

You know it was in the olden days because postage was only 20 cents!

Throwing things away. It feels good to clear out the clutter, free up some space, and let go of things that no longer mean anything to us.

We need to do that with our thoughts, too. We have many wonderful memories and thoughts in our brains, but there's a lot of junk in there, too.

Every once in a while we need to throw away the negative thoughts cluttering up our minds. 

Even better, we need to catch our thoughts as soon as they enter our brains and work on getting rid of the junky things we think.

I found an interesting article that talks about actually writing down our thoughts and physically throwing them away. It made a difference in how people felt. Conversely, if people wrote down thoughts (positive or negative) and put the paper in their wallet or purse, they were more likely to hold onto those thoughts.

So friends, let's think more about throwing things away. Let's throw away the physical clutter and junk getting in our way and distracting us in our homes, but even more so the mental junk and clutter fogging up our minds and getting in the way of living the life God wants for us.

When we "throw away" all of those negative thoughts and attitudes, our minds will be clearer and we'll find the space we need to experience God's peace, enjoy our relationships with others, and do the things we've been put on this earth to do.

"You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off [throw away] your old self, which is being corrupted by its evil desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness." (Ephesians 4:22 NIV - brackets mine)

How much clutter do you have in your life (physically and mentally)? How can focusing on God help you to throw most of it away and enjoy life more?